Day two in Hanoi, and I haven’t been run over by a motorbike yet. Wow, I’m practically a local!
I woke up early this morning and enjoyed another giant buffet breakfast. Being over my jet lag and fairly well oriented in the city, my plan for today was to take in as many bizarrely communist sites as possible.
He looks good, for a guy who’s been dead for 40 years
After breakfast, I headed out to Vietnam’s definitive communist experience: visiting the embalmed remains of Ho Chi Minh. Yep, that’s right, they’ve got Uncle Ho in a mausoleum, and every day, thousands of school groups, army trainees, locals and tourists line up to walk through the place and, erm, pay their respects.
I joined the mile-long queue and dutifully scanned my bag through about three different security points. Taking any kind of camera or cell phone into the mausoleum is strictly forbidden, and so I checked mine at the security counter, and was ushered into a single file line to walk up into the building and around the lit glass coffin in a counter-clockwise direction. In addition to photography, they also forbid shorts or short skirts, tank tops, talking, laughing, smirking, putting hands in pockets, and presumably sarcastic remarks about their revered leader. (They do allow you to buy souvenirs at the conveniently-located shops, though. Let’s not go overboard here, people.) Military guards enforce the rules, keeping those tempted to stray in line, and reinforcing the sort of surreal authoritarian feel of the place. People in this country worship Ho Chi Minh like a deity. Anyone who says that Communism is anti-religion is surely missing the point.
It should be noted that ol’ Uncle Ho didn’t want this sort of circus; according to records, he had asked to be cremated. But I guess it’s not quite as effective to bring the school groups to a site of scattered ashes. At any rate, he doesn’t look half bad for a guy who’s been dead for four decades. According to Lonely Planet, they fly him to Russia every year for a bit of maintenance, so I guess they plan to keep this going for a while.
The official narrative
The giant complex around the mausoleum also includes a number of other sites related to the “Official” story of Ho Chi Minh. Tour groups can see the humble “house on stilts” where he supposedly lived for a while, a collection of his “used” (think classic without the cool factor) cars stored in a garage, and the bunker where he hid out when the French bombed Hanoi.
There’s also a giant museum dedicated to his life, and I joined the large tour groups and went through the place, just for fun. The museum tells the official story, the one that kids are fed in the state schools and the one that anyone can quote back by the time they’re old enough to talk. The short version? Ho Chi Minh was responsible not only for the overthrow of French colonialism and Vietnamese independence, but also the overthrow of fascism, education, social progress, and peace and prosperity for all.
They may have left out a few footnotes, there.
In addition to the usual mix of tourists and weekend locals, there was a big group of what appeared to be new army recruits or trainees, in uniform, going through the museum and taking cheesy cell phone pictures in front of the various exhibits. I’m not sure whether I find that appalling or reassuring. Maybe a little of both?
Literature and education
Having had my fill of communist brainwashing, I decided to counteract that with some good ol’ fashioned religion — with a twist. I headed down to the Temple of Literature to see how the centuries-old worship of scholarship, philosophy, medicine and independent thought. Anyone see the irony here?
The temple was a bit of an ABT (“another bloody temple”, in contrast to the ABCs of Europe — as in, seen one, seen ’em all) and was packed with nearly as many giant tour groups per square inch as the mausoleum complex had been. On the other hand, the gardens were quite nice, and the pretty pagodas were mixed in with references to Confucius, stone turtles, and a monument dedicated to doctors, which I’m sure at least a few of my medical friends would appreciate.
Lunch with a cause
For lunch today, I decided to try a restaurant that I’d read about, which is actually a nonprofit program that supports underprivileged youth by providing them with training for a career in hospitality. While the food was a bit more expensive than I might have paid elsewhere, the restaurant had a stunning terrace view over the Temple of Literature, and everything was delicious. It was, however, jam-packed full of…
The dreaded giant tour groups
Considering I spent today visiting some of Hanoi’s most famous tourist attractions, I guess I shouldn’t have been surprised to see… giant tour groups. Like, hundreds of them. Japanese ones, English ones, French ones… I think I even saw a Tibetan one, though I might be getting that wrong. Everywhere I looked at the Ho Chi Minh complex, at the Temple of Literature, the restaurant, there were large groups of people wearing fanny packs and baseball caps, following around someone holding up a giant flag and shouting “this way!”. *Shudder*. Every so often, I get reminded about why I like independent travel so much. Today was one of those days.
The authentic pho experience
I couldn’t leave Hanoi without eating pho from a streetside vendor. Now, I love pho – Vietnamese noodle soup, for the uninitiated – and I eat it regularly at home, from restaurants with actual health inspections. But here, there’s nothing quite like getting it served in a bowl off the side of the road, and sitting on a low plastic stool to eat it like the locals do. It’s spiced subtly differently here, but it tastes delicious and it’s just the thing after a long day of sightseeing.
Upcoming radio silence
I’m catching the overnight train up to Sapa tonight. WiFi is highly unlikely up there, so I’ll be off emails and the intertubes for a couple of days. Stay tuned for more updates when I get back to Hanoi.